Remember when you were sending out adorable pics of your newborn, texting everyone in your life with the caption “I AM SO IN LOVE”. Well, that ends.

This post is from me as a mommy, not a therapist. Although, I recently asked myself, “Have I ever been or am currently even really a therapist? Because a 3 year old is successfully playing mind games with me.” After two weeks of constant boundary pushing and limit setting by my dear daughter (which included a full evening of top-of-the lungs screaming, crying, and kicking from summer camp pick up to bedtime; and mommy locking herself in the bathroom to “collect” myself), this was my morning two days ago:

3: Can I take my makeup to school?
Me: No
3: *falls out and throws her back on the floor* 

3: Can I put this makeup on my cheeks?
Me: When you get home
3: *falls out and throws her back on the floor* 

3: Is it splash day at school today?
Me: No, that’s tomorrow.
3: *falls out and throws her back on the floor* 

3: I don’t want to go to school.
Me: You are going to learn.
3: I don’t like to learn.

Me: Well you can go and play outside with your friends.
3: I don’t want to go play outside. I don’t like the sun.
*falls out and throws her back on the floor* 

Me: Get in this car, now!
3: I can’t – I need help walking.

After four fall outs before leaving the house, I finally dropping her off (I actually stopped and took her out instead of doing a rolling stop as I had envisioned). I realized that this particular day, this particular week – I am not in love with my daughter. I LOVE her, but I’m not “in” love. As a start to feel guilty about that, I remind myself that she probably feels the same way about me right about now - and that’s okay. We have a lifetime together ahead of us and each day won’t be as precious as those newborn moments but I love her just the same if not more.

A good friend told me: “no one tells you about this part of parenting” and she’s right. But it’s not because they are intentionally trying to hide that but when they share their sentiment about parenthood the reflexively share what they truly feel – the love, the responsibility, and their child’s beautiful face.

When faced with the angst of being tested by your dear pooh; that beautiful face will resurface and you will fall IN LOVE all over again…while looking over them as they sleep (why do they look so innocent then?).

Psychology of motherhood: Mommy -  14,745         Baby -  0 

Our Guest Blogger, Cherrell Thomas, is a professional counselor, licensed by the state of Georgia and certified by the national board of counselors. With over 7 years in the field, Cherrell has experience in multiple areas of mental health.

Through her private practice, HELPFUL THERAPY CENTER LLC, she promotes the power of inner resiliency and encourages her clients to define their own "happy". However, she may have met her match in her three year old daughter who is teaching her everyday about life, parenting, and the struggle for sanity.

Follow along as we uncover the myths in a candid conversation, only a Mama can identify.

With Father’s Day around the corner, I wanted to shine a light on daddy’s role in the psychology of motherhood. We can’t escape that a woman’s role as a parent is different than a man’s role. Sometimes as moms, we see it as a blessing and a curse. Sure, we are typically the “go to” parent to find hidden rain boots, solve problems, remember dentist appointments, and bring boxes of tissue for the classroom.

But there is a point where we get so enveloped in this role that we form a concept of “it can’t get done without me”, and if daddy was left to things all hell would break loose. This can lead to hoarding tasks and eventually over extending yourself. Eventually, you are hardly getting things done and building resentment towards dad (“He has no idea what I go through” and “He wouldn’t make it a day in my shoes”).

This is counterproductive to your initial dream of “supermom” – now you are “barely hanging on mom” and “I can’t stand your father, mom”). The truth is that he can probably take care of things, but why should he when you do, or when he does, you complain or redo it yourself? Think about it , if you went to a work conference for a week, or were in the hospital with baby #2  – I’m sure he wouldn’t forget to feed, bathe, clothe, and care for his child. Let go of your daddy duty fears and allow him to help, because although he might not 'do it like mommy', your child(ren) will be okay. So what if little Jacob had dinner for breakfast and breakfast for dinner – no harm, no foul, right?

What we must remember is that Moms are awesome, and so are Dads. They are here to be our partners; which means,  they can reap the benefits of our children's overflowing love as well. They might not be able to orchestrate everything the way we prefer, but just remember - the love is the same. The good intent is the same. It's the  techniques that differ.

This Father’s Day, don’t just tell him thank you for being a good dad – make sure to say thank you for being my partner in crime!   

Our Guest Blogger, Cherrell Thomas, is a professional counselor, licensed by the state of Georgia and certified by the national board of counselors. With over 7 years in the field, Cherrell has experience in multiple areas of mental health. Through her private practice, HELPFUL THERAPY CENTER LLC, she promotes the power of inner resiliency and encourages her clients to define their own "happy". However, she may have met her match in her three year old daughter who is teaching her everyday about life, parenting, and the struggle for sanity.

Follow along as we uncover the myths in a candid conversation, only a Mama can identify.

I knew having a second child would be a challenge after 11 years. Not just a challenge of managing finances, but a challenge of keeping order in my life. The routine I’d become accustomed to is certainly a memory at this point. My newborn son Kyle is now 3 weeks old and has managed to put the household on his schedule. Nevertheless, it is nice to have a baby around. I find myself more determined than ever to be all that my family needs and if that means wearing my supermom cape 24/7 sobeit. 

Very few things have meant more to me than being a mother. As much as I feel like I’m ready to make a grand entrance back to the corporate world, I am very much enjoying just chilling at home with my son. Knowing what to do and how to handle a newborn didn’t come rushing back like riding a bike, however. I thought it would, but I find myself having these “duh” moments. Thank goodness for friends and family. Reaching out to them for advice or a good laugh is helpful and necessary for my sanity.

I read while I was pregnant that you should sleep when the baby sleeps; which is probably some good advice for someone who doesn’t have much to do. That’s not always an option for me. I learned quickly that power naps work just as well. That takes some getting used to too, but when you have to keep a household running one quickly (grudgefully) does without sleeping for any length of time. For now at least. My fashion swag has also been compromised and reduced to a stretched out nursing bra, pajama pants, and wild untamed hair. Kyle doesn’t seem to care though as long as there’s a boob with some milk in it nearby. I may never have a chance to just let it all hang with no burden of having to even get dressed ever again so I’m enjoying it while it lasts.

Someone asked if I was done having children to which I replied “I’m pretty sure I’m done!” There are days when I think of having a daughter graduating from high school and a young son entering kindergarten that make me smile and cry at the same time.

It’s definitely a rewarding experience and it doesn’t even bother me (that much) that I haven’t had much me time. The time spent making memories is worth all that I think I’m missing which really isn’t anything as special as being at home getting spit up on.

Speaking of gassy babies-Sounds like one’s up now...

We are starting a new series, The Mama Chronicles. Our Guest Blogger, Dawn, has a new baby and a wonderful eleven year old. The joys of Motherhood are spread between the preteen and  tot leaving little room for mom to maintain. A self-proclaimed Mombie, she balances colic, housework and a business.

Follow along as she navigates a world she once new so well.